Walks In Irvington

Its not often that I actually have a spare moment to have intellectual thoughts, let alone enough to give my mind a workout. But lately, I have been able to escape the house and its many chores on walks through my neighborhood.

I have taken many walks through the nearby streets. Long walks, short walks. Walks with the girls and walks alone. Walks with Stephen and walks with Havana. Walks to Fred Meyer and walks to the park. Walks to bring on contractions and even more walks to bring on contractions. Walks to get snow chains and walks to get coffee. Walks when I am angry and walks to put Abby to sleep. And walks that were not walks at all, as Havana dragged me through the neighborhood. There have been many, many walks. Each path and street reminds me of a previous time the way looking through a photo album can. I think that is why I enjoy my walks so much, for all the treasured memories I have on the streets of Irvington.

My walks have been more frequent as of lately. Partly due to the energy level of a growing puppy, and simply because I have needed to be able to think. I can't focus at home. I can't hear my own thoughts over the volume of dishes, laundry, crying and Elmo's World. There is always something to occupy my mind when I am within these walls. It was yesterday afternoon, during nap time, and I was about to get some much needed sleep myself, when I bounded for the door. Sure, a few minutes of sleep would be wonderful, but instead, I chose to exhaust myself with Havana on a walk.

Walking with Havana requires a much quicker pace, ok, so its more like a run. But as I was attempting to train her to go at my pace, it really got me thinking about all the other paces I have taken since we moved here. It will be one year in March since we first got to Portland, and as we are looking for a new home, I really don't want to leave Irvington. Since we have been married, Stephen and I have never lived in one place for more than 13 months. I have no problem leaving the house, but maybe its all the walks that make the neighborhood feel like home. Its strange that the things that I have attached myself to are the paths where I know the unleveled spots. But I was able to slow Havana down, and really began to enjoy the path my life has taken since starting my walks in Irvington.

This last year has brought us Rachel, and she is nothing like I expected. We weren't expecting her to begin with! I honestly believe that pregnancy can give so much insight into the personality and new life your baby will bring. I was constantly in and out of active labor with Rachel, and even now at 5 months, she never knows what she really wants. Its like I have to argue with her to convince her she is tired. I already dread the quickly approaching teenage years. 

Havana, our wonderful labrador retriever was also introduced into our family. I am convinced that movies and books are written about dogs with similar beginnings like Havana's. She is one of the most sweetest dogs, and I have never seen a puppy so gentle with small children. I finally understand the sorrow that families go through upon the passing of a beloved pet.

The most dramatic result of these walks is myself, but maybe that's because I wasn't anticipating much change. Its like I am finally coming out of a dark ravine that has kept me hidden for so long. I have had difficulty in adjusting my sight. But in all honesty, I am glad to have gone through such a dark and lonesome path. At times it terrified and overwhelm me, but I am now able to seek and find peace in desperate moments. And as a result of that peace, I think I am finally entering into a walk filled with joy (and that's a new one for me).

Walks are good. Reflection is good. Even if it's only taking notice of how many houses have gone up for sale in the last six months. Inhale deeply and take those precious moments to think and make memories that will guide your future steps.