Currently, at the moment, I am no longer working full time outside the home. I have been using the term "unemployed" but a dear friend of mine quickly reminded (and affirmed) me, that being home all day with two babies is a full time job. I just don't get the luxury of getting a fiscal reward. Our current situation has also added the complexity of needing to relocate our family. All this sudden change, as you can imagine, has really caused Stephen and I to pause. Obviously, something in our approach is off. We have had to move 4 times now since we were married in April of 2005. Our context has changed, and our angle needs to be different.
I can't help but wonder why I am not working full time in the midst of a moving transition. Is it just to have more physical and emotional energy to relocate? Or could it be something more? Could it be that this is more than just a shift in where and how we have been raising our family to something dramatically different? Are we not to pursue the typical avenues of finding a new home?
I'll admit, I have spent time recently entertaining the idea of being a stay at home mom. Mind you the term itself is a joke. Any mother who is able to not join the workforce becomes subject to the massive flow of errands. Even as I write, I am not at home. I am taking a break doing youth work at the church. I have spent more time out of the house this last week than I ever did working the graveyard shift. I actually love that I am able to have the mental capacity to give time and energy to the youth ministry. For so long, like the last year, it was only a once a week kind of deal. But being home during the day has given me opportunities that I have not had in a very long time. Its kind of exciting.
So what to do? Do we as a family totally downsize? Do we make adjustments that I do not have intentions of going back to work? Do we stop looking for a home that gives us the "most bang for our buck"? Do we sacrifice convenience for a price tag? It would be so much easier if we didn't have kids in tow... but than the sacrifices and rewards would be very different.
I love timing. It lets me know that there is meaning and purpose to all that is around us. That we aren't just going at life for the weekend or a summer vacation. All of this adds up to something, something wonderful and beautiful. And well worth the wait.
Oh the joys of parenthood. You can always move back to Cali and join us in our struggle. At least, we'll all be together.
ReplyDeleteI probably can't speak for Marissa, but, from my observation, she has been a lot happier since she ditched the full-time fiscal life. She gets to spend more time with the boy and she seems a lot more relaxed.
Of course, there isn't a one-size-fits-all family lifestyle, but our current situation works for us.
On the amazingly up side, because we don't have as much money as we used to, we definitely value a dollar more. And we're finding that we're happier and thankful for the things we have. We're not wasting away our money on random space-thieves.
Wow...I just sounded like my mom!!!
Anyway...great write up.
Keep on pushing forward sister.
Girl, you are and I are walking the same path. But you are so right, even in the midst of change and sacrifice - is a richer and more rewarding life.
ReplyDeleteHang in there...and your friend is right. Staying at home all day with the kids is a full-time job. With two kids, it's an 80 hour a week job. Remember that :)